Ewww

I was reading at a blog I really enjoy, "Real Daughter" and she had written a post called: "Birth mothers hate me" and of course I had to read.... Well, I want to be the first to let you know that I don't hate you... and as a "FIRST MOTHER", I would like to give a big "Shut the hell up" to Birth Mom Buds and I find their official site offensive, especially when I saw that it is funded by damn adoption agencies, of course... it serves their fricking purpose, doesn't it.

There will absolutely be no change unless we stop screwing ourselves!!!!

Just the facts...

I find it interesting that people who lobby for closed records use the abortion card, when the real fact is, that abortion is chosen more often by first mothers who have placed a child for adoption to avoid the pain, than by women who are in fear of their child "finding" them one day...

So ... shouldn't they be lobbying for an end to adoption too, if that is their reasoning? if it causes more women to have abortions? or perhaps, they should give it up and give adoptees their OBC's...

Sometimes....

Sometimes I will come across something in someone's blog that truly touches my heart. This post did that. Adoption is painful. It hurts. I have heard of firstmothers committing suicide after realizing that they could not live without their child. Well anyway, just wanted to share the post.

Support Elaine Penn

This wonderful adoptee activist, Elaine Penn, will speak her truth to New Jersey legislators on Monday, June 14th at around 2pm.

You can listen live at:

http://www.njleg.state.nj.us/

She has endured so much due to her "maternal source" (Read story here) that we all need to give her our love and support!

Here is her blog, give her a shout!

I have been busy...

and this is what I have been doing... This is my Granddaughter Gracie, this is my heart...

Gracie could have been lost to adoption, however I wasn't ready to watch my daughter go through the pain I went through... So I am my daughter's support... I am "co-parenting" so to speak...

Origins - USA

I am a member and you should be too!

Origins - USA

The Blog of Origins-USA.org….
the voice for and of mothers' rights and keeping families together.

Dear Birthmother Letters

Recently my sister through a forward sent me a request from an old school friend of hers. Seems the friend is drumming up support for her "agency" adoption. It directed people to her "page" on the agency's website and allowed friends of the family to send a comment or message as a "plug" so to speak for the prospective adoptive parents. On their page, and others I browsed, were "Dear Birthparent" letters. I guess I was offended by a majority of the letters I read. I told my sister and she said truthfully she wouldn't have forwarded it to me had she realized what it was. I did not read one letter that addressed the pain the "FIRST MOTHER" would feel after. Most said, you will be able to rest easy knowing your child went to a good home, etc... blah blah blah or similar. I didn't feel one PAP really had a clue about the after effects of adoption on the first parent or the child. I wanted to send them all comments that said - prior to adopting, please read "Primal Wound" or something. Every time I think perhaps people are getting grasp on the actually aftermath of adoption, I see there is a "fresh crop" of people adopting without a clue as to what they are in for. I know another blogger out there who is in the process of adopting. She gets it. She will be a wonderful adoptive parent because she is an adoptee, she gets that it, isn't that easy. I would have loved to have found ONE letter that said "We understand that you will suffer for the rest of your life after this, we know that our wonderful completion of our family will be at your expense. We know this child will suffer feelings of abandonment and we will do our best to help them deal with that as well as help them build whatever relationship with you that they want or need in the future. We will never guilt them because of the deep "need to know" feelings inside them. We promise to read "The Primal Wound" annually and keep it by our bedside just in case." oh well... I never found that letter...

Hugs!